You will never have a girl cut off circulation to your entire arm.

So Ching Chong trying to make friends was interesting. But before I tell you about that I want to tell you about a dream I had on this weekend

>be on plane with Ching Chong
>Plane lands
>Get off of plane
>Be in lesser Korea
>Meet Ching Chong's mom
>She gives me disapproving looks
>Ask Ching Chong where her father is
>She points over to a man holding a sign that reads "Whitau Pigu go home"
>Go to her parents house
>Some time passes
>Breakfast time
>PSY (The guy from the Gangnam style vid) is making breakfast
>Ching Chong asks him what we're having for breakfast
>"We're having Reesses for breakfast"
>"Candy for breakfast", Ching Chong asks?
>"No! Not candy! Resses Puff cereal" I explain, "it's like delicious candy in every bite!"
>Then everyone starts to dance in a highly choreographed style.

It was weird. Ching Chong even said so. Also if you're wanting to know how her parents would think of our relationship if they found out. Well this picture captures it pretty well.

That's how they would see it.

Anyways Saturday was pretty interesting. I told Ching Chong I was inviting some friends over the day before so she had at least a chance to say no with she didn't want to. Didn't want to try and force it on her. Now I'm not sure if she realized this was all part of my grand socialization plan for her or I just wanted to hang out with some friends. Didn't really matter though.  She was okay with them coming over. We we're just going to marathon some movies and shoot the shit. What neither Ching Chong or myself foresaw though was the fact that everyone brought a horror movie. So they could have super spooky scary Saturday. Now I've shown Ching Chong a few scary movies like the Thing and Alien. Both of which frighted her pretty badly.

Well we watched a couple of films.

First up was Romero's Night of the Living Dead. A classic, which I don't think I need to explain. Then there was Suspiria which felt like I was freaking out on acid. I couldn't  really follow what was going on but fuck man it was freaky. Then we saw the 1976 version of Carrie. Ching Chong sympathized with Carrie, and actually cheered her on when she started killing everyone in the gym. Last we watched Audition. That was insane. The girl in it makes is crazy, even Ching Chong thought she was bat shit insane. Anyways afterwards Ching was all.

Wouldn't let go of my arm and wanted the lights on for the rest of the night. she did socialize a bit. Talked a little and actually played patty cake with the one other girl there. I don't know why the girl asked Ching Chong to play patty cake with her, probably just to see if she would.

I think my friends see her as some sort of Dandere moeblob or something.

So yeah the thing went okay. Going to try to do something that requires her to interact a bit more eventually. Should be fun. Especially since alcohol will most likely be involved. It's going to be great.

I don't think I can come up with a witty title for this.

So I tried to get Ching Chong to make friends. I think I can say operation amity and harmony failed. Mostly because Ching Chong tended to freeze up when speaking to new people and hide behind me. She would be talking rather hesitantly to someone and then just stop mid sentence and but me between them. Suffice to say people were a bit weirded out and I had to try and explain that situation to some perplexed individuals. I just told them she thought she was speaking English incorrectly and got really embarrassed. After class I asked Ching Chong what the hell happened. She was hesitant to say anything but finally said, "I don't want friends, I have anon. If I spent time with them then I'd have less time with anon".

Then she put on a happy face and acted like nothing happened as I just stood there in stunned silence. So yeah, failure.

I was perplexed and bamboozled, but I was curious so I later asked her about this a bit more. And I learned some very interesting things. I could just lay out the conversation we had but I think it will make more sense if I reveal this information by telling about Ching Chongs past some more.

I've already said that Ching Chong didn't have the best situation at home and that her first relationship did not go well at all and that because of that she got picked on by other kids. Well I never went into great detail. They were incredibly cruel. Holding her down and writing whore on her forehead with marker, trying to strip her in front of others, would steal stuff from her locker and desk, write nasty letters about her and leave them on her desk. Group work was hell for her, other students would refuse to work with her and the teacher had to force them to work with her. Which in the end only made the situation worse as it drew attention to her. She became pretty depressed and was considering doing some very rash things. Well that was until she decided to try and use some magic spell thing she found on the internet.  She took an apple and a knife, and stand before her mirror. Then sliced the apple into pieces. Stuck some pieces on the point of the knife and held it over her left shoulder. Then looked in the mirror. Now the point of this little ritual is so you will see a vision of your future spouse appear behind you to take the apple. Guess who she claimed to see? Yeah. No I don't personally put much stock in superstitions or such things, but Ching Chong, well she's a different case. From there on she set about making sure she set about doing her best to in school so she could go learn over seas. Yeah she came here to find some pale red haired faggot who she allegedly saw in a mirror.

Anyways she eventually did arrive in the states and took that history class not so long ago where she saw me. Now at first she wasn't sure how to proceed and she was waiting for me to make the first move. Well waiting might not be the right word seeing as she stalked me and what not.  But when I lost that job and needed a new place to live well, she pounced on that opportunity.

Ching Chong didn't tell me this before because she thought it might scare me away. I wasn't sure what to think at first. But then i realized that with all the other stuff Ching Chong has done that this is just another one of those interesting stones on the rocky road to something something cheap metaphor.

Questions?