Thanksgiving part 2

So I left off at Ching Chong being pissed if I remember. Well anyways nothing really too exciting happened for the rest of the day. My dad meet Ching Chong and he seemed to like her. Though even if he didn't I don't think he would have said anything. Because then he would have had to disaggree with my mother. Which doesn't happen anymore, not since I punched him in the face. But that's a shitty story.

>My sister and niece eventually leave with Tsun Tsun giving Ching Chong a hug good bye
>Ching Chong get's to sleep in my room and I'm sleeping in the den on an air mattress
>At first Ching Chong was happy she was sleeping in my old room, but then saddened when she realized it no longer smelled like me
>Anyways though we all eventually wake up and start preparing the meal for the holiday
>Think we started eating at noon or one
>Besides the four of us there was my sister, her two kids, her husband, and my dad's sister.
>Before we started eating my nephew pulled me aside to talk
>To tell you a little bit about him, he's pretty gangsta, not the brightest kid but a hard worker
>Anyways he leans and whispers "so is it true"?
>I ask him what he's talking about
>"You know, the sideways v-jay"
>I ask him how big is school bus is
>"what"
>"Because if you keep saying retard shit like that they'll put you on the short bus", I say before punching him in the shoulder
>Anyhow we eventually all sit down Ching Chong sitting to my right and Tsun Tsun sitting to her right.
>Tsun Tsun tried to feed her yams but Ching Chong really didn't want any, she was ecstatic however when I gave her my share of the olives. (me >9000, TT- Raditz)
>Well as we finish off the main things my mother informs us it's time to bring out the pumpkin pie
>Ching Chong volunteers to go get it
>Mom tells her the get the whipped cream in fridge as well
>Not too long later we hear a crash
>I rush to the kitchen with Tsun Tsun close behind me
>Ching Chong is on her knees in the kitchen floor in front of a dropped pumpkin pie
>Starting to cry

>As I try and comfort Ching Chong from what I gather from the crying she slipped on the rug in front of the refrigerator(not the first time something like this has happened)
>Tsun Tsun is standing there for a moment before trying help Ching Chong off the floor (I now think this was an attempt to feel up Ching Chong up a bit. Because she pulled her up by putting her hands under Ching Chong's armpits while lifting from behind.) 
>Ching Chong does eventually cheer up after we clean up the mess and she unnecessarily apologized to my mother seven times

>Friday would have been pretty boring were it not for Tsun Tsun showing up after her mother dropped her off asking if Ching Chong could take her to the movies
>I asked her what movie she wanted to see
>"Like Crazy"
>My hopes of Neal Patrick Harris were dashed
>Anyways Ching Chong ends up inviting me and I had to watch to a sappy Indie love story
>I mean if you like those things it's okay but I was still butt hurt about not getting to see NPH
>Then we drove Tsun Tsun home
>In which she hugged Ching Chong goodbye for a rather long time

>And then she whispered something in her ear before leaving
>When we drove away I asked Ching Chong what Tsun Tsun said
>"She said you don't deserve me. I don't think she likes you anon"
>It was then I realized my niece wanted to make love to Ching Chong

Which I'm not sure how I feel about. On one hand she wants to steal her from me, on the other hand she has really good taste.

I'll write the road rage story tomorrow.

Thanksgiving part 1

Okay children it's story time.

>So we got to my parents house
>Ching Chong seems happy but very anxious
>As soon as I put the car into stop she grabs my hand
>Asks what happens if my parents don't like her
>Reassure that they'll like her
>"But what if I do something embarrassing"
>"Just be polite, my parents are suckers for that"
>"Okay"
>So we get our stuff out of the car and walk up to the house
>Ching Chong puts down her bags rings the doorbell and backs up about a meter or so
>My mom answers the door
>Ching Chong bows, not a pussy 20 degree bow ever, full 90 degree shit
>Then stands straight again and says "Nice to meet you Mrs. anon"
>Mom's face when

So we bring our stuff in while my mom asks Ching Chong how the trip was excreta, found out my dad was out right then. He was out taking a Sunday drive I.E. having a smoke. But guess who was there? Remember my troll sister? Yeah she was there along with her daughter. I'm not sure I mentioned this before but my sister is roughly twice my age, and technically my half sister. Long Story short my mom had relationship with a guy years way before my dad and they had a kid. Thing didn't work out and he ended up dead in Coahuila. Then eventually my Mother met my Father and with the help of the fertility specialist I was made. Moving on, my sister brought my niece along with her.

My niece, who I'll be referring to as Tsun Tsun, is thirteen years old and has been in that whole "boys are gross" stage of her life for quite awhile.

>After I'm done chatting with my sister
>I go over to her with my arms raised to the side
>She just stares at me
>"What no hug for uncle anon"
>"No thanks, I already took a shower today"
>100% Tsun 0% dere
>Then Ching Chong comes into her view
>Her usual chilly self is replaced with a much warmer personality
>"Hi, nice to meet you I'm Ching-oof", she says as Tsun Tsun forcefully hugs her
>Try to hide my jelly butthurt at not getting a hug with a sarcastic comment about the ice queen melting or something equally retarded sounding
>"Nonsense Anon I always give people hugs" 
>About to call bullshit when Ching Chong informs us she can't breath

A little bit later once we've unloaded our bags and what not. Ching Chong is in my old room with my mom
>"And this is Anon's old Saxophone he played in high-school" 
>"Do you have pictures"?
>"Boy do we ever, anon go get the photo albums"
>"Even the ones with me as a baby"?
>"Especially those"
>Get them out
>Everyone except for me and Tsun Tsun are crowded around the albums
>"And this is anon when he was born, this is him when he ran around the house naked, this is him at Disneyland" excreta. 
>Which during this time Ching Chong was really happy
>Too happy, like right after sex happy
>And then came the the inevitable "And this was anon with his prom date"

>Ching Chong was not amused
>"How many girlfriends has anon had"?
>"More than he deserved" quips Tsun Tsun
>"Tsun Tsun shut your little bratty mouth", my sister replies
>My mom either an early victim of Alzheimer's or just choosing to ignore what happened there, "I think it was three, maybe four"
>Ching Chong is still a little bit pissed but turns the page
>"And that picture is anon at a Jazz band concert"

If you're wondering Ching Chong did ask that question on the way home, although ask might be the wrong word.

Back

So me and Ching Chong got back home. She's sleeping right now, all tuckered out from the car ride back. Looks adorable. Anyway got a few stories from the trip. Probably won't get them all out in this post but whatever.


>We're driving on the interstate and we stop to get some gas and use the restroom. 
>I do my business, wash my hands, and then go get a slurppe 
>Ching Chong meets me at the counter looking a little disturbed
>Guy working there was Indian (wait to combat the stereotypes there Gandhi), and I thought she hadn't seen one before
>We leave there
>We get into the car and get back on the interstate
>Driving for about an hour or so while I'm occasionally enjoying my slurpy
>"Anon, can you pull over I have to go"
>Turns out Ching Chong didn't use the restroom
>Not because the bathroom wasn't clean or anything
>No
>It was because it smelled funny

Mon visage















I'll write the rest of the stories latter but to give a sneak preview.

>Ching Chong is obsessed with my past
>Ching Chong drops Pumpkin Pie
>Is my niece a Lesbian?
>Is my nephew racist or just retarded?
>Ching Chong has road rage

I'm gonna have Pumpkin Pie fuck yeah

So me and Ching Chong are leaving for my parents house tomorrow. We should get there sometime mid to late afternoon. Probably be back really late Saturday. Not sure when I'll make another post after the trip. Ching Chong is really excited to go though, so I'm sure I'll have some stories when I get back.

Mix of pride and dissapoint

So I downloaded DCU online (yeah I know slowpoke) for Ching Chong she seems to like it. I wanted to be a villain at first and she went all moralfag on me.  Now initially I was like

But I warmed up to the idea after a few death threats, slaps to the face , hugs and kisses she convinced me. She's a rifle wielding speedster tank with fire powers. Who looks adorable and not threading at all. I'm a Booster Gold recolor. Despite what Ching Chong says purple is a manly color. So we'll probably be doing that for most of the time until we leave for our Thanksgiving trip to my parents place. So probably not any full blown stories until we get back. Until then I could answer any questions you guys have about me or her. Don't be afraid to ask that weird one you've had in the back of your head for awhile ever.

Also

>That feel when your watching that awesome cut scene where Lex and company are killing all the heroes

>That feel when Ching Chong asks you who the bald guy is

>My coin face when

Ching Chong says the darndest things

So last night was pretty fun. We went to the restaurant and were seated when we spotted an old Jewish couple not too far from us. They waved over at us to come sit with them. Because we're model citizens who listen to their elders we of course did. Everyone introduced themselves and we sat down with Abraham and Sarah (not their actual names obviously). While we were waiting for the waiter to come they started asking us questions how did Ching Chong and I meet, how long we knew each other, those sorts of things. Ching Chong was happy to answer most of those. Then out of the blue Sarah asked us how the sex was.

Our faces when. We didn't really know what to say. I tried to say something but the only thing that came out of my mouth was figgis-fiddis. Ching Chong just sat there her face as red as a tomato covered in blood. Both of them just smiled a bit before Sarah said "it's okay, we didn't wait ever. I was actually starting to show by the time the wedding came around". This is when we heard their life stories and the vast amounts of unprotected pre-marital sex they had. Finnally the waiter got there and took our orders. I was able to change the situation by telling Ching Chong she was going to love sauerkraut. So we started talking about Germanic culture and food. Anyway we we're glad to have gotten off of the previous subject. So we got our food. Ching Chong was pleased with her side of Sauerkraut, saying it tasted kind of like Kimchi. So me and her had the Eisbein dish, it was delicious. Anyways we're still talking about food and Abraham brings up Kishke and how he's still frustrated he has to go to Israel if he wants some (it's been banned in America since the 60's). Ching Chong asks what that is, and Abraham explains it's a Yiddish dish of stuffed  beef intestine. Ching Chong asked what Yiddish meant. So Abraham explained it to her. She had this look or surprise on her face for a moment before it completely disappeared as quickly as it came. Well anyways we continued eating without any interruption. We eventually payed for our meal and left on good terms.

So we left the restaurant and we're walking to our car when Ching Chong says to me "Anon, how come their noses weren't big?"

I'm laughing so hard I actually fall to the ground. Her ethnic and cultural ignorance is hilarious. Anyways that was my night.

Sie wie Hüte anonym?

So guys I've decided not talk to talk to Ching Chong about the whole wife comment thing as nothing good would come from it. So instead I've decided to take her out to dinner tommorrow night. Yeah we're going out to this German place I've wanted to try for awhile. So yeah. I'll report on that when I get the chance. Ching Chong was really happy when I told her though. I also convinced her to try the sauerkraut because that shit is delicious. In the meantime have a hat.

If I wasn't taken I'd let NPH fuck me like some Cambodian whore, no homo.

So I was just cruising the Internet after I found out about Chris-Chans trial and arrest looking for some information. Didn't find too much. Anyway that's when my brain told me that I should go and try and translate that line of Korean Ching Chong said to me during sexy times. Well I found a transliteration thing here that seems legit (http://sori.org/hangul/conv2kr.cgi) so I put the words in and got this 난 당신 아내이요. So I translated that with google expecting something about sexual pleasure but it came out as

I'm your wife.

Now at first I freaked out and thought Ching Chong had somehow drugged me, married me while I was under the influence, and didn't tell me about. But then I realized if that was the case she would have put a wedding picture up on the wall somewhere. Which I checked and there was no picture to be found. So I was able to rule that out. But then I wondered if she had proposed to me. I ruled that out though because if she had done that she would have done it in English so I could have replied. So maybe it was just Ching Chong being adorable. Anyways I'm not sure what to do now. I mean obviously I'm going to fuck her brains out when she gets home today. But I'm not sure whether I should talk to her about this. I mean I realized a couple months ago I was probably going to be with Ching Chong forever. But more so as that engaged couple who stays engaged for years and then I'm gunned down because I wore the wrong colors on the wrong street. Then Ching Chong would hunt them down while becoming a violent vigilante.

Then Hollywood would make a movie about it and I'd be played by Neil Patrick Harris.

But you know in all seriousness I realised I haven't talked about our future at all with her. So yeah advice on how to do that?

I need to learn Hangugmal

Hey guys. Things are going go with us here. Ching Chong is still eating the leftover Halloween candy so far the past few days she's been in a really good mood. Well until Friday morning that is. We were taking our weekly constitutional like normal although it was far more windy then usual. Unfortunately for Ching Chong she'd decided to wear this blue skirt of hers which seeing as the elements are giant perverts caused her a bit of trouble. I mean at first it was fine because it was just me and her and I was teasing her while she tried to keep her skirt down and simotanelous hide her blushing. But as went further we encountered a group of punk ass kids. There were three of them, all around the age of fifteen or sixteen. Why they were there I'm not sure. When I was their age I was doing much more productive things then loitering in a park. Things like smoking cannabis in basements, driving around in cars with friends while playing the music obnoxiously loud, or having sex in the marching band room. You know, character building activities. Well anyways they spotted Ching Chong and her trying to maintain her decency. They of course hollered and wolf-whistled at her to hide their faggotry. Before I could do anything Ching Chong sprang into action. Screaming threats at the top of her lungs, with all too familiar rage.

Pic is related, it's one of the more polite things she said. They promptly got the fuck out of there. I of applauded her behavior telling her that she was quite gangsta. Ching Chong wasn't pleased with her performance though. She blamed herself for the actions of the punks, saying if she had just worn something else that this wouldn't have happened.  So the way back home was me convincing her that she wasn't a "slutty whore" as she put it. She was a little resistant but I eventually convinced her.

Well anyways later that night we were both in the mood and I got to use some of that information other anons provided me when dinning at the Y. Now maybe it was because I had warmed her up with that or maybe it was something else, but whatever caused it the sex was great. She was actually drooling afterwards. That ahegao face, seriously.

It just feels so good to give her that. She also said something afterwards in her native tongue. She wouldn't tell me what it meant but if I had to guess based on the context it probably had something to do with my cock or ability to produce sexual pleasure. It sounded something like "nan dangsin anaeyiyo". Which I'm not sure how to translate that. I'm not sure if anyone reading knows how to speak Korean but everyone would appreciate it if you could solve this mystery.

Halloween story time

So time for some Halloween stories. Well like I said we didn't even get over twenty people so i was disappointed by that. I did get a few interesting stories though.

>Ching Chong is dressed as spider man, has a nice costume
>I'm wearing a venom shirt, black pants, and a black ski mask with web pattern on it made from whiteout

>First trick or treater we got was this five year old dressed as the Green Lantern.
>I call him Booster Gold
>He says he's green
>I realized that joke is older than he is

>Few people later
>Get this brother and sister dressed as Toph and Sokka from Avatar
>Ask her why she didn't dress as Katara
>"Because she's a goody two shoes who talks too much"
>She got extra candy

>Very next trick or treater
>Little girl dressed as Optimus Prime

>Costume is made out of cardboard
>Pic looked very related
>Extra Candy

>Last visitor of the night was a drunkard, was proably on Charlie Sheen too
>"Maria I'm sorry...wait, Spider man, this isn't my house"
>Ching Chong is afraid he doesn't seem to notice, I think he was honestly trying to figure out why Spider man was there
>He sees me
>"Look out Spider man it's Nigger Spider man!"
>He actually did a 180 and ran away

So yeah that was interesting.

Then we watched Higurashi.

Since some of you are don't know what that is, I'll elaborate. It's a series based on popular visual novels. Anyways the year is 1983 in the small rural village of Hinamizawa and Maebara Keiichi has moved into the sleepy village along with his parents.  There he attends school and is a member of the games club with his friends, Ryuuguu Rena, Sonozaki Mion, Houjou Satoko and Furude Rika. Even though Hinamizawa seems like a quaint, peaceful town to Keiichi soon finds out that is not so. In addition to finding out his friends can turn into some really crazy bitches he learns that the town is cursed with a string of serial murders that occurs in the village every year on the night of the Watanagashi festival.  During the first year, the manager of the controversial dam construction was brutally murdered and dismembered, and a worker went missing. The second year, a head supporter of the dam and his wife fell off a cliff and down a waterfall, but only the man's body was ever found. The third year, the priest of Oyashiro's shrine dropped dead and his wife drowned herself in the swamp. Her body was never found. The fourth year, a housewife was found bludgeoned to death and her nephew went missing. This will be the fifth year.

The story is told in a non-linear fashion involving chapters or arcs, with each chapter being a sort of parallel universe and telling the story from a different character's point of view. So I decided since it was Halloween I'd turn off the light and watch the cotton drifting arc with Ching Chong. Now there's going to be some spoilers in here probably so if you don't want those go fap or something.

>Story is being told from Keichi's point of veiw
>He meets Mion's twin sister Shion, mistaking the later for the former
>It is revealed to the audience that Mion has a crush on Keichi (Ching Chong dawwed)
>Keichi wins a tournament and gives the prize to Rena, bad move (Ching Chong frowned)
>The group attends the Festival, where Tomitake Jiro and Takano Miyo are introduced (you won't need to remember their names), and the curse discussed.
>Shion and Keiichi join them in breaking into the ritual tool shed of the temple, really bad move
>Shed is full of torture equipment (Ching Chong wonders where the cute happy story went)
>Tomitake and Takano are found dead soon after, the former with his throat torn out and the latter burned in a barrel
>Keiichi freaks the fuck out and begins to think he and Shion are next
>Keiichi asks Rika for help

>She and Satoko go missing, along with others from the village
>Also turns out that the Shion Keichii has been talking to might not be Shion at all (Ching Chong is confused)
>Keiichi and Rena suspect that Mion might be related to Rika and Satoko's disappearances and confront her
>She admits it 
>But asks for half an hour alone with Keiichi before she is arrested
>Keichii goes full retard and agrees to this
>Instead of having sex with him she takes him to the underground caverns of the Sonozaki estate
>Keiichi tries to comfort a distraught Shion, Mion knocks him out with a rock from behind
>Mion taunts Keichii for a bit claiming there's a demon insider her, before Keichii convinces her to let him and Shion go
>She agrees to this, and Keichi and Shion are let go, while she disappears
>Later Keiichi sees Mion outside and upon reuniting she stabs him and laughs. (Ching Chong freaked out by laugh)
>In the hospital, the police reveal that Mion was among the dead bodies that they found in the caverns, the police leave Keichii to ponder this
>Then Mion comes up from under his bed and kills him
>You are left wondering who was phone (Ching Chong wants to sleep with the lights on)

But you know what was scarier than that? Ching Chong asked me if I'ld have given her the doll.